Republican candidate Donald Trump and Democratic nominee Senator Hillary Clinton arguing about the colors to wear this evening -and the winner takes the White House.
Clinton: All I have to do is divine from what I know of you. Is blue the color of the sort of man who would risk his own presidency, or his enemy's? Now, a clever man would not risk his own presidency, because he would know that only a great fool would risk what he was given. I'm not a great fool, so I can clearly not choose the suit in front of you. But you must have known I was not a great fool; you would have counted on it, so I can clearly not choose the suit in front of me.
Trump: You've made your decision then?
Clinton: Not remotely. Because the color blue originated in Egypt, as everyone knows. And Egyptians love cats and only criminals love cats. Criminals are used to having people not trust them, as you are not trusted by me. So I can clearly not choose the color in front of you.
Trump: Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.
Clinton: Wait till I get going! Where was I?
Trump: Egypt. Or Benghazi. I get them confused.
Clinton: Yes -- Egypt, and you must have suspected I would have known the color blue's origin, so I can clearly not choose the suit in front of me.
Trump: (nervously) You're just stalling now.
Clinton: You'd like to think that, wouldn't you? You've lifted Chris Christie, which means you're exceptionally strong. So, you could have chosen blue for yourself, trusting on your strength to save you from a non-power color. So I can clearly not choose the suit in front of you. But, you've also bested Rand Paul, which means you must have studied. And in studying, you must have learned that man is mortal so you would have put the color blue as far from yourself as possible, so I can clearly not choose the suit in front of me.
Trump: [nervously] You're trying to trick me into giving away something -- it won't work --
Clinton: [triumphant] It has worked -- you've given everything away -- I know what color to choose.
Trump: Then make your choice.
Clinton: I will. And I choose [stops suddenly and points at something behind Trump] is that an Eastern European supermodel?
Trump: [Turns, looks] What? Where? I don't see anything.
Clinton quickly switches the colors while the Trump has his head turned.
Clinton: Oh, well, I could have sworn I saw something. No matter.
Trump turns to face him again. Clinton starts to laugh.
Trump: What's so funny?
Clinton: I'll tell you in a minute. First, let's put on our outfits for the debate...
