News Flash !!
Exciting news just in from Oxford University. A previously obscure lecturer in cinematography has published a book titled The Selfish Dot, in which the author challenges the established view that films are the most important feature in the history of filmmaking. He says the most important element is not the camera or the subject or the film or the images, but the dots that make up the images! His reason for this revolutionary view of film production is simple yet profound and undeniable – images on the film come and go, but the dots remain! The film, the author explains, is merely a vehicle used by dots to perpetuate their existence. When asked why he referred to the film dots as selfish, the author explained that although the dots appear to be cooperating with all the other dots to produce film images, this is really selfishness in disguise because a single dot cannot make a picture, so it rather cleverly combines with other dots, and in so doing brings about a potentially endless existence. The history of movie production, according to the author, is actually all about dot selection. He further explained that the dots are not actually selfish, but that this is a really, really, useful metaphor to help people look at dots in a whole new way. Chapter headings include The Immortal Dot, The Long Reach of the Dot, and Dotty as a Fruitcake. Already plans are in place for a sequel titled The Extended Image, in which dots will be shown to be “sitting at the centre of a radiating web of cinematographic power” where really influential dots induce filmmakers to make even more films, thereby increasing the numbers of the fittest dots. A high-tech action movie is also planned starring Keanu Reeves, and sources close to the author have revealed that its title will be The Dot Matrix. How cool is that?
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