In the outstanding "Charlie's Angels" film of 2000, a spectacular opening sequence is just that; one of our heroines (in disguise as LL Cool J in disguise as...an African prince? It's never said who "Mr. Jones" is supposed to be, other than awesome) pops the emergency exit door on the very large airplane with her elbow to carry a terrorist wearing a bomb vest into the open air and save everyone.

Drew Barrymore, the heroine in that scene, is about 5'4" and maybe 120 lbs. soaking wet. She couldn't have done that. At 6'2" and 100 lbs. heavier, neither could I. It's great cinema but terrible physics.

Yet perhaps because they only learned science in movies, a few people have attempted to do just that recently. In all cases they were stopped but it wasn't going to happen even if everyone just sat there and laughed at them. As Professor Bob Thomas of Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University notes, a pressurized cabin at 35,000 feet is going to require over 23,000 lbs. of force on a larger airplane emergency exit door. The average person won't even make it budge. Even an above average person my size is only going to exert around 400 Newtons, or a pound-force of 90, against the door.

On the ground, no problem opening that door, but in the air, you'd need to be a superhero to pull that off. So sorry, goofy people who think you're going to make a statement about masks opening a door in flight. It will never work.

And sorry Drew! From "Ever After" to "Fever Pitch" you pack a big acting punch into a tiny form factor, but you're no Hulk. Neither am I. Neither is anyone else.

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